Do you believe in love at first sight?

I started this blog to write about my life, love and travel, yet I have not blogged for a while.  Perhaps this is because I do not believe I am an eloquent writer; a writer who can depict exactly what they are thinking or feeling in words—thanks a lot Blarney Stone, I kissed you upside down for nothing!

Why I decided to actually start a blog beats me.  I have always been the “keep your feelings to yourself” person.  I had a few diaries growing up, but I never wrote in them in case someone read about my secret crush or other things that would have just “killed” me if someone found out.   (I do remember writing about a crush once, but within a week I was sure somebody had read it, so I tore up the pages and then placed them in different trash cans). I still sort of have that mentality of keeping to yourself.  To this day my dearest friends usually don’t even know my crushes or deepest feelings. 

Now I have an On-line journal that describes my thoughts and feelings and I don’t stop there—no I then announce it to my friends on Facebook.  For someone who is extremely shy (some of you may not believe this about me, but it is pretty true) it’s a crazy notion that I now have a blog for anyone to read.

Today’s blog is my thoughts on love.  Perhaps tomorrow I’ll write about life or traveling.

Do you believe in love at first sight?

Ahh..the phenomenon of love at first sight.  Are you a believer in it?  Personally I am not.  That could be because I have never been a victim—if you will—of it.  I do believe that love at first sight is possible (but very rare) for others, but not for me.

Oh yes, I am one to walk by a guy of the street and think that he is adorable, attractive or just down right hot (these are all very different adjectives to describe very different guys).  As quick as these thoughts enter my mind they also leave my mind.  I am not one to be drawn to someone by looks alone.  For me love is something that must grow and evolve.  I am much more attracted to personalities than a connection based on a first glimpse.  Hey, looks are a definite bonus but not essential (good teeth are essential and I will not compromise on that, however).  I am someone who likes to know a person, although,  I never go into a friendship thinking, “I hope this goes further than ‘friendship status.’”  No, I love the normal friendship.  I love the craic (fun), inside jokes, stories, honesty and non-judgment that is shared between good friends.  Then weeks, months, or even years (hopefully not too many years) later you find that your connection is more than mere friendship.  I write “mere friendship” as if friendship is a lesser status, however, it is not.  If I thought this, then I would not be insistent as having it as a foundation.

This way of thinking/believing that true love happens only after becoming dear friends does have its downfalls…many downfalls.  He may find who he thinks is his one as you discover you believe he is the one for you.  He may move away; you may move away.  You may not fall in love with each other at the same time or you are too terrified that showing your true feelings can and will ruin your friendship.

Heck, maybe my wanting friendship first is just because I’m terrified of getting myself too deep too fast then feeling either suffocated or getting hurt.  Yeah, maybe that’s it.  If so, I just wasted a heck of a lot of time writing the initial part of this blog.

One thing I know for sure, though.  A love that lasts must also have friendship, honesty and humor.  Perhaps the order in which these come does not matter as long as you accomplish and maintain all of them.